Hide the worst bits of your shit job behind Dream Job MR

October 10, 2018

 

A new application, Dream Job MR, announced today that plans to augment your workplace with the dream job you've always wanted.

Donny Glasgow from special computing developer, Exploding Breakfast, said "Imagine it's just another soul torturing day at Greycube Administrations. Put on your MR glasses, select one of the inspirational companies and you're suddenly a valued employee heading for greatness".

"Select VOLv for example and imagine you're in a meeting but that's not your usual asshole manager. He's now hidden behind a friendly VOLv employee who loves your ideas. Seriously, all your ideas! Hold on, is that Gabe approaching to tell you how impressed everyone is with your recent presentation? And what's that on your screen? That is Half Live 3 and you're an integral part of its creation".

"Imagine it's now lunchtime. Switch to Gargle or FaceFace mode and you're now in a beautifully designed open plan dining gallery with access to unlimited broccoli shots and licorice muffins. That processed meat/grey slop combo you usually eat everyday has been augmented with Michelin star goodness".

"We're also working on an advanced algorithm that can re-word conversations in real-time. Do you really want to listen to your colleague vomit stories of their increased property value or daily commuting hassles? All that shit will be filtered out and replaced with motivational poems, read softly by Morgan Freeman".

Dream Job MR will be available in Q5 of 2019 for all special computing platforms including HelloLens, Magic Sheep and that Mete one.

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