Please don't be a stupid f**k with our new standalone headset ask Octopus lawyers

March 27, 2019

 

With the imminent release of their new standalone headset, Octopus's lawyers have issued a request that people avoid using it in bizarre, life threatening situations. And at the very least, to not post videos of it.

Irresponsible early adopter, Bret Special, said "I can't wait to strap that thing on, drive my car or attempt to go the wrong way up a one way street on my Kawasaki Ninja".

Upcoming VR NewTuber, Zeldamort, said "I'm planning some extreme downhill skateboarding while playing Extreme Coaster 3. On the small chance I actually survive, the video's going to go next-next-level!"

Speaking softly while clasping his hands over his face, Octopus lawyer, Donald Genaro, said "We're sure we've got enough safely warnings, 'moron clauses' and guardian features to ensure things will go smoothly. We're even offering a paid service where someone will go to peoples homes and attempt to prevent them from destroying electrical equipment or landing on family members".

"Who the fuck am I kidding. There's always going to be one massive twatkettle who's going to play Gorn while standing on the edge of an active volcano".

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