Nikonolta announces premium 460 camera no-one can afford
Nikonolta enters the premium 460-degree camera market with the reassuringly expensive Elite Ball 460. It features 460 degree hyper-volumetric 'light feel' video capture with double-half 3k image quality, 5 lenses (each with a 9-degree FOV), twin 1D spacial audio, 6 minute battery life, optional 230-degree shooting mode,1200 TB storage and the ability to stream directly to your smart bicycle.
Nikonalta's revolutionary light feel capture technology not only allows the viewer to move their head 4 inches from side to side it can also produce a full 460 volumetric movie with file sizes as low as 19 TB per minute. Chief Marketing erector and VP of stitching, Daniel Chicken, said "We noticed a few of our competitors creating insanely priced 460 cameras that no-one will buy and they got some great media coverage. We're doing that!"
"It also comes with with Mental 460. Our advanced editing package written by one of our interns before we fired him for smoking too much cheese. Tools include auto tripod distortion, stitch line wobbliness booster, our patented noise enhancing compression technique and is guaranteed to start crashing repeatedly the day before your project is due to be delivered to the client".
The Elite Ball 460 is available for pre-order from their site with the 230-degree model starting at 212,000 euro-dollars.